Michael Jackson-Sarah Palin Affair Revealed

Sources today confirmed that Michael Jackson and Sarah Palin had an affair. That is the only story regarding either one of them that I would like hear about. Otherwise, the media needs to let it go. MJ left the world and Sarah Baracuda left her post in Alaska. Time to move on! Instead the Mainstream Media, as usual, has served up a piping hot plate of nonsense for us to devour daily.

Anchor: Good evening. Our top story tonight: Michael Jackson is still dead. Here to comment we have Sean “To Be Announced” Combs, once again between nicknames. How do you feel about our coverage of this tragedy?

Combs: I think we should focus on the positives of Michael. We got months to analyze his flaws as a human being.

Anchor: Thank you, Sean. Now, we have Rep. Peter King of New York. Congressman, how do you feel about the coverage.

King: This guy was a pervert and a low-life. To give him this much coverage, day in and day out, what does it say about us as a country? This coverage is too politically correct. What we need to ask ourselves is: Would you leave your child or grandchild in the same room with Michael Jackson?”

NO NO NO! God help us, Diddy, I can’t handle months of Michael coverage. And please, Rep. King, we don’t need to spend time debating how perverted MJ was, we need to STOP TALKING ABOUT IT!

Speaking of things I don’t want to hear about, guess what! Sarah Palin resigned as governor. If it’s about making money, I don’t care. If it’s about running for president, I don’t think her strange timing will pay off. If it is about leaving public life, then fantastic! I will not be subjected to constant reports on every uniquely-named member of her family. I am begging the MSM to stop reporting on her.

Unless of course there’s any chance she had an affair with Michael Jackson.