Elections do not come down to who has the most real votes, (see Gore, Al, 2000) but rather who has the most Make Believe Votes. Every four years, each state gets together and votes. However, they don’t actually vote on a president, they vote on a trusted Townsman to ride his horse and carriage to Washington D. C. and cast a vote for the entire town. Obviously, there was no way we could actually count up everyone’s vote. Plus, how could they all get up to Washington in their buggies? Who would watch the farm?
Well, one day, we all realized that most of us aren’t on farms and the TV figured out how to count everyone’s vote. This became apparent when the townspeople rode to Washington to vote for Bush in 2000, even though Al Gore earned more real votes. Then, we turned to the nation’s Town Elders, in their deep wisdom, to explain to us what happened. They explained to us that we were bad at making laws. “Now, children, you have proven you are too stupid to elect your president. Florida, we thought you were responsible enough to conduct your own elections. We were sorely mistaken. So, we’ll have to decide for you.” The elders voted 5-4 for Bush.
Associate Justices:Nancy Grace, David Souter, Clarence Thomas, Stephen Breyer (Top Row)
Roy Snyder, Judge Reinhold, Judge Judy, Mike Judge (Bottom Row)
Chief Justice: Judge Dredd (center)
This led many people to say, why the town representatives or the elders decide. Let the people decide! At first glance, this seems like a good idea. But remember, the Electoral College was set up for important reasons.
1) Keep third parties out.
Do you reeeeeeeeally want this guy running the country? Look at him! LOL
2) Keep the people confused
When people understand the electoral process too clearly, they start to catch on to the necessary ways that politicians manipulate them and they try to actually advocate for themselves and take control of their own country. It also lowers electoral optimism and turnout to dangerously high levels. Remember in the primaries, the long lines at the voting booths? Some people didn’t even get to vote. They were disenfranchised, all because of high voter turnout.
3) What would the Founding Fathers say?
How dare you question the system put in place by the founding fathers? How DARE you?
Even so, I MOVE THAT WE ABOLISH THE ELECTORAL COLLEGE
In this country, we let the big cities decide the election. They get more electoral votes than the American Heartland (what did Palin call it, the real America?). Even worse, this creates a liberal bias in the Electoral College, since big cities always vote Democrat. What if we let the president be elected not by the Elders, the Townspeople in the horse and carriage, or the Upper West Side? What if we let the Joe Sixpack decide? Why can't Joe the Plumber have a voice??? Look at the electoral map! Those tiny blue spots are overriding the will of the large red spots (The Mountains and Plains are proud to endorse John McCain!). The Elite, Snooty Liberal’s best friend is the Electoral College and it’s time we got rid of it.
2 comments:
Waco, you've been drinking too much of MoveOn.org's kool-aid. The electoral college favored Bush in '00, the first time a candidate has won the popular vote but not the electoral college since 1888. It's unlikely to happen for another 100 years. Gore supporters (plus all the hippies who'd rather complain about stuff than actually vote) are still miffed they were on the losing side of a freak coincidence. A more compelling argument for abolishing the electoral college, I think, is the disproportionate campaign time spent in swing states like Florida and Ohio. Have a popular vote, and suddenly the candidates have to spend time in non-swing states. And yes, as you pointed out, the voter turnout increases across the board.
If memory serves, the Bajorans had a primitive electoral setup in B'hala during the First Republic, but they abolished it for a popular vote. You should see what the results were; perhaps there's something to learn from it.
LeVar
Okay, apparently, you think the implication that the Electoral College is antiquated and worthless makes me a hippie. I disagree. I cannot speak to Bajoran politics, although I know they didn't elect you cuz you would have been too busy challenging Riker to drinking contests to actually campaign.
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