Four years after the first black president is elected (and tragically assassinated) and the dreams of Martin Luther King are crushed like so many of America's powerful black leaders, the white American aristocracy transcends from the shell-shock of minority rule, and a new political consciousness has emerged in America. Thanks to a woefully inadequate standard of excellence in main-stream media, the public's requirements for an effective president have devolved to a point where nearly anybody with "electability" is eligible for the presidency. Gone are the days when voters were stiffled with trivialities like "issues" and "ethics". The modern pollster understands that a politicians success or failure in this new political landscape hinges solely on a candidates likability and commitment to his/her own core ideals or "values", whatever they might be.
Enter: Three Six Mafia
The Three Six Mafia resume, is a essentially a "how to" list on presidential election.
Everything seemed good for Three Six Mafia; however, as America has learned with other things like Communism, Ford Pinto's and John Kerry, things often look better on paper then they do in real life. Aside from their stellar pre-election credentials, how would they respond to questions from the "common" man?
Everything seemed good for Three Six Mafia; however, as America has learned with other things like Communism, Ford Pinto's and John Kerry, things often look better on paper then they do in real life. Aside from their stellar pre-election credentials, how would they respond to questions from the "common" man?
TOWN MEETING TONIGHT - Special Guest: Three Six Mafia
QUESTION 1:
Travis Nedry (Age 71): What will the Three Six Mafia do to ensure that the 150,00 seniors who are living in poverty in America are able to afford the medication that they desperately need?
Three Six Mafia: Any O.G. who need some kind of drug, whether it be that kush, perp, oxy cotton, yay...we hustle that, ya feel me?
Question 2:
Danny Epstein (Age 37): I hear a lot from your campaign about fixing the "so-called" problems in our poor communities, and trying to change the fight against something you call "in-equity". Honestly, i'm not sure I buy into your whole fairy tale, where minorities are somehow treated unfairly. Perhaps we should try teaching them the value of hard work? Honestly, where do you stand on issues that matter to me, like the war on terror?
Three Six Mafia: [Smacks Mr. Epstein in the face with a piece of decorative bread] You see that Danny boy? When you act like a bitch, you get smacked up like a bitch. Now to get to your faggot-ass question. Little bitches like danny boy don't understand the "fairy tale" that's going on in our cities 'cuz, they ain't never been up in our cities. And to be trill wit' ya, you'd be dead in five minutes if you came to my hood. To answer your home-land security question, i'd be lyin' to say i ain't handled mine. 9's , 45's whatever the job take. High risk, high profit, I fuck wit' dat.
Question 3:
Lisa Mcpherson (Age 33): Where do you stand on a woman's right to chose? I havn't heard your camp make clear preference toward pro-life or pro-choice and to be blunt, your NARAL ranking is less than stellar. Can you give me your word that you'll work to preserve the woman's right to choose?Three Six Mafia: To answer your question Ho'..err..Ma'am, we don't necessarily support a woman's right to choose anything; however, if we decide to run that train on ya', and any of us is a baby daddy, you best be gettin' to that clinic.
It's not necessarily pretty, but the Three Six Mafia has the essentials that American voters have shown they so desire in a candidate. They're electable and they show a blind devotion to an ideology we can never possibly understand. They are Winners...in 2012
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